I think we need to rename hypochondria
people with apearently want something wrong with them
but don't want this. even thou it is quite a legititmat sickness
and is something wrong with them, it's not what they want.
so I prepose we change the name.
for example we could call it the tommies (just for word play of course).
so if someone starts complaining, you could say
"sounds like you have got a bad case of the tommies"
and they would think you were generaly concerned with their health/general well being and they would be happy. a conversation gone well.
now of course this would leed to situations where you would here them say
" I have got a bad case of the tommies, and my knee hurts"
and you can smile, and understand just where this conversation is going.